Thursday, November 1, 2018

2019 Crapstone Basketball Preseason Power Rankings

Courtesy of J.Tyler Cook

                Man oh man is it a good time to be me. Patriots with a huge win, Red Sox in the ALCS, Celtics starting tonight. Fantasy baseball championship, number one point scoring team in fantasy football (can you imagine thinking my team wouldn’t make the playoffs!) and now we are onto fantasy basketball. Admittedly, I am a terrible fantasy basketball player (due to drafting guys I like more than guys that I think are good) but I think I know a decent amount about real basketball. That’s why these rankings will have nothing to do with fantasy, and only to do with how each team would perform if they had to play together in real life.

12. Corry – Cause I’m Mr Whiteside
PG – Jordan Clarkson
SG – Jaylen Brown
SF – Carmelo Anthony
PF – Joel Embiid
C – Rudy Gobert
Bench: Julius Randle, Andrew Drummond, Hassan Whiteside, Caldwell Pope

Writeup: Corry’s team is case in point why this matters zero for fantasy purposes… I’d put his team in fantasy among the top. While Taylor has the team name “My Centers Got Centers”, Corry’s team is the direct application of that. Embiid, Gobert, Drummond AND Whiteside!!! I contemplated playing three of those four and having his team play a 2-3 zone and just crash the boards. Honestly, when you see that other teams struggle at center you’ll know why. Unfortunately and not surpringly… the other positions outside of his bigs stink. Still would love to see this team in real life.

11. Dustin – Tricky Ricky
PG – Kyle Lowry
SG – Russell Westbrook
SF – Taurean Prince
PF – Dario Saric
C – Clint Capela
Bench: Ricky Rubio, Enes Kanter, Hollis-Jefferson, Dennis Smith

Writeup: Corry’s team is to Centers, as Dustin’s team is to Point Guards. Watching Westbrook and Rubio co-exist on this team would be laugh out loud funny. Lowry, Russ, Rubio and Dennis Smith leave a lack of depth on the wings and elsewhere. This team vs Corry’s would be something that needs to be tested in NBA 2K. However, the lack of shooting and wing depth leaves this team at 11.

10. Sam – Believeland Miracles
PG – Damian Lillard
SG – Luca Doncic
SF – Ben Simmons
PF – Nikola Mirotic
C – Deandre Ayton
Bench: Collin Sexton, Andrew Wiggins, Nikola Vucevic, Markelle Fultz, Tyreke Evans

Writeup: Sam has one of the most unique teams in the league and if I wrote this in 2022 he may have the best. Unfortunately, there are too many rookies on this team for my liking in a competitive game vs the other squads. That being said… having Doncic and Simmons with their court vision and passing IQ would be a blast to watch and if the rookies are as transcendent as they could be, this team would rise drastically. Lillard and Mirotic would have to play off ball and space the floor which they’d excel out. Offensively, I think it works, but Simmons is the only average defender in this starting lineup. Ayton was a beast in preseason and could be one of the best centers if his career pans out as it should. For now, this team is limited defensively and unproven.

9. Taylor Call – My Centers Got Centers
PG – Jrue Holiday
SG – Paul George
SF – Otto Porter Jr
PF – Tobias Harris
C – Karl Anthony Towns
Bench: JJ Redick, Eric Bledsoe, Robert Covington, Steven Adams

Writeup: Taylor’s team is the one I go most back and forth on. The reason I love it? Shooting, shooting, and more shooting. Towns may be the best shooting center in the league, Porter is a dead eye, Paul George can create his own shot. He even has Reddick and Covington on the bench? Why is he ranked so low then? Well quite simply the lack of superstar power. Unfortunately for Tay’s hypothetical team… they have no one I feel like is an Alpha and will win you games in crunch time. Holiday is solid but defensive minded, Paul George got stuffed into a locker by Joe Ingles last year, and Towns couldn’t post up Jimmy Butler in practice the other day. I like the team and the depth, the top talent is just not what would lead his team to victory. Too many Betas.

8. Garret J – Kawhi me a River
PG – Gordan Dragic
SG – Lonzo Ball
SF – DeMar DeRozan
PF – Kevin Durant
C – Draymond Green
Bench: Kevin Knox, Lou Williams, Trae Young, Dwight Powell

Writeup: Love the team name but he doesn’t have Kawhi! He needs to Knox it off (I’ll show myself out). Garrett gets a boost by having the second best player in the league and one of the most versatile defenders in Draymond Green (I’m having the small lineup be their go-to). Normally a team with a serviceable center would be able to post up Draymond but Corry has all of them. Shooting outside of Durant however is a huge issue, but I like the defensive chops of this team and the ability to have players move the ball. I just don’t like any of his players as great #2 scoring options and his bench is weak so he settles in the middle of the pack.

7. Tyler – Pippen Ain’t Easy
PG –Jamal Murray
SG – Brandon Ingram
SF – Giannis Antetokounmpo
PF – Kevin Love
C – Myles Turner
Bench: John Collins, D’Angelo Russell, Bogdan Bogdanovic, Jarrett Allen, Miles Bridges

Writeup: Honestly this team would be a terror to face. Outside of Murray look at the size and wingspan of that team! They remind me of a better version of the bucks in real life, but unfortunately the bucks in real life a good but not great team. I think Ingram and Murray make the leap this year, and Love will pad his stats without Lebron Blames in Cleveland (Leaving again… SAD). John Collins and Myles Turner are interchangeable if I wanna be more athletic and go smaller. However, when Giannis steps off the court this team immediately goes down the drain and even I can’t play him 48 minutes. If Murray, Collins and Ingram make the leap like I expect, I could see it rising. Lack of great guard play (even though Giannis is my PG) hurts this team in a fictional matchup.

6. Creighton – King James Version
PG – Mike Conley
SG – Bradley Beal
SF –  Lebron James
PF –  Lamarcus Aldridge
C – Wendell Carter Jr
Bench: Jonas Valanciunas, Reggie Jackson, Rudy Gay, Willie Cauley Stein

Writeup: Two Words, Lebron James. Surround him with shooters, a tale as old as time. Beal is used to being a #2 scoring option and so is Aldridge. Team has guys who are usually on winning teams. HOWEVAH (Steven A Smith Voice)… ZERO WING DEPTH. Lebron gonna guard every wing every day? NOPE. Even Lebron can’t do that. Also, not sure how the fit is with Aldridge. My brother’s friend went out to lunch with Danny Ainge’s son (who works for the Celts) and he said Lebron is literally the equivalent of two superstars. He is that good and that much better than anyone that I believe it. However, just like real life, Lebron can’t do it all himself and can only take a team so far. Great team name Creighton.

5. Alec – One and Done
PG – Steph Curry
SG – Devin Booker
SF – Josh Richardson
PF – Paul Millsap
C – Marc Gasol
Bench: Kemba Walker, Kyle Kuzma, Jordan Bell, Dennis Schroder, Malcolm Brogdon

Writeup: Maybe I’m in love with Devin Booker, but this team reminds me of the pre-durant Warriors. Booker takes the Klay role, Richardson in the Iguodala role, and Millsap as Draymond. Marc Gasol a clear upgrade, but then add Kemba Walker on the bench! Brogdon another player who is way better in real life than fantasy and Kuzma is a good bench scorer. Why isn’t this team ranked higher than? I Don’t know, other teams are just really good. While Steph and Booker can score, the wing depth may be a black hole offensively and Millsap and Gasol are getting up there in age. If Millsap is still prime Millsap and Gasol is prime Gasol, this team goes even higher. That’s the only reason I’m skeptical.

4. Jordan Heeb – Philly Special
PG – John Wall
SG – CJ McCollum
SF – Jayson Tatum
PF – Al Horford
C – Nikola Jokic
Bench: TJ Warren, Gary Harris, Joe Ingles, Marvin Bagley, Mo Bamba

Writeup: Man oh man is this team fun. Horford, Jokic and John Wall are three of the best passers in the league, Tatum and Mccollum can just go get you buckets. Gary Harris and Joe Ingles are role players every team needs. Honestly, I may bench Wall for Ingles and run the team through Horford and the Joker, and have Wall dominate on the bench. Bamba offers intriguing lineup possibilities as well. While McCollum and Tatum can get buckets, this is a team that is not well off playing iso-ball. If they back cut, and if the Joker playing style becomes contagious, this team would score score and score and have good enough defense to win most games. No weaknesses shooting here (outside of Wall) either. The wing depth is an issue (as it is for most teams) but Horford is versatile enough to cover many of the bigger ones. A lot of different lineups would lead this team to victory, just may not have enough offense to get an isolation bucket when that is inevitably needed. If Tatum becomes that guy year two though… watch out. Awful team name though and that’s not because I’m a salty Patriots fan (It most definitely is because I’m a salty Pats fan);.

3. Dane – Kyrie on my Hayward Son
PG – Kyrie Irving
SG – James Harden
SF – Gordon Hayward
PF -Harrison Barnes
C – Blake Griffin
Bench: Donovan Mitchell, Jusuf Nurkic, Jabari Parker, Jeff Teague

Writeup: First, Dane has the best team name in the league and I’m 90% sure his love for this team name influenced his draft decisions. While I’m not sure if Dane understands just how good Nikola Jokic is, this squad here would be an intriguing real life dynamo. Hayward and Barnes are solid complimentary wings who know their role, and a Kyrie-Harden back court features arguably the two best iso scorer in the leagues. Donovan Mitchell comes in off the bench to provide some bench energy and put on his defensive beast cap, and Blake as small ball center gives them shooting at every position (with four good to very good passers in the starting lineup). Nurkic could handle the bigger centers. The Kyrie/Harden combo may not have the most natural chemistry, but this team would be an offensive force.

2. Sean – Mars Blackmon’s Best
PG – Victor Oladipo
SG – Khris Middleton
SF – Kawhi Leonard
PF – Lauri Markkanen
C – Deandre Jordan
Bench: D’Aaron Fox, Kyle Anderson, Will Barton, Montrezl Harrell, Tim Hardaway Jr

Writeup: Sean has a type, and his type is athletic two way players which bodes well for this exercise. The only knock on his squad is point guard play but if Oladipo can accept more of a facilitator role this team would be insane. Easily the best defensive team on this list, Oladipo was first team all defense and Kawhi a former DPOY. Middleton is one o the most underrated players in today’s game, a player who scores without demanding the ball and forms a terrifying backcourt. Markannen stretches the floor and should see year two improvement, and Jordan rim runs and protects the paint. The bench isn’t exactly overflowing with talent (nobody really has a great bench) but Fox, Anderson, Barton, Harrell, and Hardaway Jr are five energy guys who could fill in at a moments notice. The main reason they aren’t ranked one? Is Oladipo as good as he was last year, and will the MVP candidate Kawhi return? Until these questions are figured out, the honor of being the best fictional real life team belongs to none other than Papa Bear Austin Jones.

1 Austin J – The Process
PG – Chris Paul
SG – Klay Thompson
SF – Jimmy Butler
PF – Aaron Gordon
C – Anthony Davis
Bench: Zach Lavine, Josh Jackson, Dwight Howard, Danilo Gallinari, Josh Hart

Writeup: This team would be insane. Klay Thompson (and probably Kris Middleton) are two players who are significantly better in real life than they are in fantasy, and it’s no surprise their owners have the top two spots. Everyone on this starting lineup can shoot respectably from deep, score and play defense. The starting five defensively is an absolute terror (I know I said Sean’s was the best… this team is the best defense) and you have five guys who can score 16 or more a game. You have alpha males, complimentary teammates, and even bench guys who could come in and give teams a different look. Paul and Anthony Davis don’t have the best injury history, but this exercise doesn’t predict injuries (good for those two and Gallo on the bench) and would be an absolute dynamo. The only knock is a lack of playmaking for others outside of Chris Paul, but I think this team would make it work if Butler and Aaron Gordon accepted roles as beast defenders with AD, Paul and Thompson carrying the load of the offense. So congrats to Austin J! No idea if this team will work for fantasy, but the process is complete for the fictional best real life team in the Crapstone fantasy league.

There it is folks, most likely I’ll win because I’m on an absolute streak right now, but you guys can have this!

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