1. Good Better Betts – Tyler Cook
Death, Taxes, Corry wearing purple shorts
and Tyler Cook fielding a championship fantasy baseball team. Certain things
you can always count on. I have one of the most well rounded teams, an amazing team
name, my two favorite players (Benintendi and Betts) and a will to win. Thor
will be the best pitcher not named Kershaw in the league if the Mets can score
any runs when he starts, and if one of Gray/Greinke/Cole make the leap, I love
this squad.
Miss those shorts.
2. Shark AreNADO – Corry Smith
Corry did a little extra research this year
and it showed. He has the best staff in the league headlined by Kluber,
Strasburg and Hamels. If Carrasco can stay healthy and Keuchel/Price can bounce
back I don’t know how his team loses. Though he is no Manny Machado, Arenado
should continue to bash thanks almost exclusively to Coors field and no talent
of his own. His outfield makes me vomit, but an extremely solid infield should
be enough to carry him far this year.
3. Maraika Rockwood – Maraika Rockwood
We’ve long known Maraika is Alec’s better
half, but I didn’t think it would extend to the fantasy realm as well. With her
recent baby, she acquired the wisdom of both a mother and a human baby, which
may have provided an unfair advantage. However, she used that knowledge to
draft an amazing team. I’m a huge fan of her outfield (Trout, Stanton, Jones?
Straight stupid) and if Darvish can stay healthy he has top five pitcher
upside. You could argue she has the best lineup in the league and she may
continue to ride her hot streak to the fantasy playoffs.
4. All Braun no Brains – Creighton Hardy
Creighton is sneaky one of the best fantasy
players out there which is relatively shocking considering how little he posts.
I have no idea of his activity (so this is how my Elders Quorum President
feels?) but I know he’s doing well (Fantasy basketball championship, great
baseball team here). Creighton landed Braun for another year keeping what is
the most perfect Player Name-Owner combo since Sam DeBaltzo drafted Rudy Gay in
fantasy basketball. Cueto and Jansen are studs, and Fulmer and Ray have upside.
Creighton is one other great pitcher away from being considered a favorite.
5. Pitches be Crazy – Charlotte DeBaltzo
For those who didn’t see yesterday, Charlotte
owned me in the draft room worse than I’ve been owned in a long time (When I
referenced defiling their wedding invitation last year, she said “At least I
have an invitation to defile.” Needless to say I got wrecked). Charlotte’s
owning may transfer to fantasy baseball this year as she looks to make the
playoffs for the second year in a row. Encarnacion, Kinsler, Franco and Lindor
is an amazing infield and her outfield is power, power and more power. Her
staff is headlined by arguably the best fantasy player in the game in Clayton
Kershaw (seriously, guy is unreal) and if he stays healthy and she checks I’d
be shocked if she isn’t contending by the end of the year.
6. Michigan Cougars – Sam DeBaltzo
I hated Sam’s team last year (and he won
the championship) and I hate it again this year. I am not a big fan of the
pitcher-pitcher and more pitcher strategy but he has obviously made it work.
Sam will no doubt check frequently and build his putrid lineup like he usually
does and make the playoffs again. Scherzer-Bumgarner is just an insane duo and
he has an army of relief pitchers to boot. His lineup is literally the ugliest
thing I’ve seen since Lonzo Ball’s jumper, but like Sam has done with his own
looks, he’ll make it work.
7. Danee Manee – Danee Chase
The newest member of our fantasy baseball
league held her own in her maiden draft. What Danee lacks in ability to make in
creative team names (Danee Manee? But still better than Maraikas team name) she
makes up for in upside. Harper could be the best player in fantasy and she got
him at pick ten (insane) and she adds the Seager brothers to make up one of the
best trios in the league. If Schwarber plays, he rakes, and she has a good big
three in the rotation. Her depth is legitimately awful in the rotation and is
thin in some lineup spots, but if her stars perform she will go far.
8. Bay of Puigs Invasion – Alec Rockwood
Alec’s team is interesting, as his rotation
Is filled with young players who have showed potential who have yet to make the
leap (Martinez excluded). Like finding ketchup in the couch cushions, there are
a lot of potential surprises if Taillon, Rodriguez, Duffy, Quintana, Manaea
live up to the hype. HOWEVAH (Stephen A Smith voice), I don’t like his lineup
much after Freeman, Bryant, Murphy and Yelich. There is too much risk for me to
rank him higher, and knowing Alec, he will stop checking by week two. Will Alec
finally check enough to be fantasy relevant?
9. Billy Beane – Taylor Call
Like Billy Beane’s Athletics, Taylor’s
fantasy teams have not been relevant in what seemed like forever. Taylor’s
lineup has depth and no glaring weak spots but lacks upside after Altuve (who I
think regresses a bit this year). Sale and Verlander is an absurd duo, rivaling
the top two of any other team in the league, but outside of those two I just am
not high on this team. Taylor can take solace in that he is as sexy as Brad
Pitt (especially when he has scruff) but he may need a Jonah Hill like pudgy
sidekick (Austin Jones?) to join him and take his team to the next level.
10. Wok it out – Dane Jacobsen
Dane is one of the best fantasy managers
out there just based off pure drive and hustle. If I were to take a team in
real life for the next ten years, I may choose his. Sanchez, Odor, Sano,
Correa, Goldschmidt and Baez are all young studs who I feel like in some cases
are a year or two away from being the fantasy stars the will be. Lester is
great, but I think he finally starts to age and while Archer is nasty, he plays
for a putrid Rays team. If his young uns progress like his real life Baby Beau
has (kid is a legit superstud baby), this ranking is too low.
11. Bautized unto Repencetance – Sean Rockwood
Two teams on autodraft, bottom two teams in
the league. Sean probably won’t read this or check this league and I think he
hates fantasy after his basketball team got decimated by injuries, we will see
if Sean changes his team name now that he has neither Joey Bautista or Hunter
Pence. Cabrera and Rizzo back to back along with Beltre is an intriguing big
three, but his team has a lot of swing and miss to it and arguably the worst
rotation in the league. Combine this with the fact that he’ll pay as much as
attention to his team as I did in an average college class and I’d be shocked if
Sean isn’t bottom three.
12. Clown Question Bro – Dustin Jensen
Dustin actually had real life reasons to
not make the draft and he got extremely screwed when it came to the auto-draft.
Last years Cinderella story (he won like 8 straight to make the playoffs last
year, almost the championship) has finally run its course. Machado is a stud
(and once again the undisputed best third baseman in the game, no one else is
close), but the autopick screwed him with Billy Hamilton and Wil Myers decently
early. If anyone can turn this ship around, Dustin can, but he has hit a bit of
a fantasy slump (probably because he has better things to do with his time
haha).
Well that’s it for predictions, see one of
you guys in the championship!
